Sights & Sounds: Man Smashes 2-year-Old Baby To Death

Now this not a case of husband and wife but a case of a man's cruelty to a woman and child.He killed another man's child while venting that the mother of the child reported him to the police.

A Man identified as Kehinde Ayelehin is cooling his feet off in the police net currently due to his attack against a woman Oluwabunmi Faith and her baby that lead to the death of the child.This incident occurred at  Supare Akoko ,in Akoko South West Local Government Area of Ondo State.

The suspect attacked Oluwabunmi Faith ,who had her baby on her back and accused her of being responsible of the fact that his house  at Alimaliu Igbose camp,was raided by the police because she divulged information about him to them. 

According to the report ,Ayelehin hit her ,which resulted in a fight ,where he pulled down the baby and smashed the 2-year old baby on the ground.When he saw that the child sustained serious injuries, he he tried to escape but was apprehended, as a concerned neighbour  had already informed the police of the attack on the woman and her child.

The baby was immediately taken to a nearby hospital but unfortunately she died ,due to the injuries sustained during the attack.

The incident was confirmed by the Ondo State Police Public Relations Officer(PPRO),Mr Wole Ogodo,an Assistant Superintendent  of Police. He said the suspect was immediately apprehended by a team of police who visited the scene of the crime,and added that the woman was innocent of the accusation, as the police raided the said camp on intelligence report.

He further described the action of the suspect as cruel and wicked,saying Ayelehin would be charged to court for murder ,stating that no man had the right to take another man's life in whatever circumstances.That the people should avoid taking the laws into their hands. 

Sights & Sounds:Groom Abandons Bride At The Altar

On Saturday,22nd February 2014,the groom in the picture above called off the wedding due to the reason that the Pregnancy test carried out by the Redeemed Christian Church Of God in the parish that was suppose to conduct the wedding came out positive.

The Bride Cynthia insisted that she was not pregnant and another pregnancy test was carried out in a different hospital and it came out negative .Then the church carried out a second test with their own doctor and again it came out positive.

caption from one of the souvenirs at the aborted ceremony

The groom stated that he had never slept with the girl,therefore he could not continue with the wedding.

Despite the wedding being called off,guests still sat down.They ate,drank and took souvenirs home.

The groom's family ironically carried the wedding cake ,wine and other drinks as well as souvenirs  that they did not pay for as they were paid for by the brides's family.

While all this was happening ,all the bride could do still in her wedding gown was to cry and insist that she was not pregnant.

Sights & Sounds:Man strangles Wife and hangs Self

It is a shame that when a man dances with his family to knock on a woman's door for marriage ,it could be that the man is the angel of death that has come to knock on the door as is the case of Mrs Kemi Bankole pictured with her "Angel of death" Mr Bankole below.

 Late Mr & Mrs Bankole

The husband , known to be quite aggressive to the wife ,who from her countenance in the picture looks like a peaceful lady .

She has endured all forms of domestic abuse from her husband .An incident that  was referred to was that, two years ago the husband locked Mrs Kemi Bankole out of the house naked without clothes but for the timely intervention of the church members who quickly came to her rescue.

From the story, Mr Bankole who seemed to be insecure always accused his wife of flirting and on Valentines' day  in a drunken state started with the accusation  till he finally  allegedly strangled her to death.

When asked what happened to his wife he stated ,that she woke up from her sleep screaming the names of her children and holding her neck and strangled her self to death.What an outrageous lie.

The family conducted an autopsy and also told Mr Bankole that they intended to carry out a traditional autopsy  on the deceased and that was the last time he was seen alive as he went to his uncompleted building and hung himself ,leaving a suicide note.Find the complete story of the tragic couple HERE

You see this story simply states what the beautiful actress Adaora Ukoh who recently walked out of her marriage of many years due to domestic violence is talking about.

She said that women in domestic abusive relationships should leave alive while they still can in other words they could be killed by their supposed loving husbands.

For full details of her views on signs of domestic violence click on the following link  Domestic violence by Adaora Ukoh

Abandoned by Parents,Impregnated at 15 and Homeless at 16

In life we as parents expose our children to certain harsh conditions that determines the route their destiny will take.The result of a broken home,this teenager/mother pictured below has come to face the harsh reality of life in a very hard way.It still calls to mind my sentiments on the issue of having a broken home.

Bimbola Oguntoyinbo is 16 years old

Yes ,it is not the fault of both parents sometimes but in this case it obvious that the mother of this girl in the story led a reckless life and was not there to fend for her daughter materialistically,emotionally and psychologically.Lets not talk about her father for he was never mentioned.That shows the role of the father in the life of his daughter

As she started working at a young age where she met the father of her child .It is not a surprise that he later abandoned her to fate,for he lacked morals when he slept with a minor.

Click on the following link for the complete story- abandoned-parents-pregnant-15-homeless-16/

Sights & Sounds:Boy 15 years old Conveniently Traded For Two Bags of Rice!

Is it hunger? Is it greed?Is it lack of respect for life.

This is not different from the days of old that, people were sold into slavery for fried chicken ,mirror ,eggs,or a pair of sandals etc.

Seun Aderinwale  Exchanged for Two Bags of Rice

The story below is of a 15 year old boy called Seun Aderinwale was successfully exchanged for two bags of rice valued at N20,000 on Monday by man yet to be identified.

It was gathered that ,this incident happened at Igando in Alimosho area of Lagos State,occurred when a the man whom Seun was meant to be working for as an apprentice,took him to him to the shop owned by one Iya Ibrahim .

On getting there met with the son of Iya Ibrahim as Iya Ibrahim  herself was not available at the time. Since he did not have the money to pay for two bags of rice ,he used the boy Seun as collateral saying that he will return to pay,and collected bags of rice and left.

When Iya Ibrahim came back,she was surprised to see the little Seun in her shop.It was later resolved that the pastor of a Celestial Church intervened  to settle the matter.

To resolve the bags taken by the con man it was agreed that Seun's father should pay for one bag while the owner of the shop should take responsibility for the other bag that was taken by the culprit.

When Seun's was questioned how he met the con man,he was vague and said that he did not know the man as he met him recently  close to his house when he was sent on an errand to play lotto.

Sights& Sounds:Marriage of Nollywood Actor Crashes

Solomon Akiyesi

The Union between Nollywood actor Solomon Akiyesi and Lillian,his second wife has reported dissolved.

It was said that the bride paid by the actor to his in laws was returned to him a few days ago in Port Harcourt ,Rivers State.

Recall that Solomon was in the news in 2013,when he attempted to marry a lady ,Uloma in Lagos but the bubble burst after Lillian,who was in Port Harcourt got wind of it and stormed  Lagos to put a halt to the wedding ceremony.

Word in the grape vine currently says ,that Solomon was recently summoned by the father-in-law to Port Harcourt,but unknown to him the old man called him to refund the money paid by Solomon to marry his daughter,Lillian.

It was learnt that Solomon and Lillian have not been happy living together since the incident took place.

However Solomon Akinyesi is yet to comment on the matter as he could not be reached.

Sights & Sounds:9-Year Old Lives with Anaconda, Says She is Crazy about Snakes

Hmmm This is so weird!Will you let your child have a snake for a pet or expose him /her to a wild animal or reptile such as a snake.

Cute Krista plays with ,trains and handles all snakes at a local reptile house where she even feeds alligators.Parents is this right? you be the judge.View the the pictures below with discretion

 Kritina Guarino is an expert snake handler despite just being 9 years old.

The Brave school girl lives with a staggering 30 reptiles,including anacondas and a 12ft python at her home in Michigan,America.

She eats ,sleeps and plays with these creatures,some of which are twice her size and  she held her first snake when she was just two years old.

The Plucky school girl has even been bitten a few times but none of the snakes that had bitten her were venomous and Krista claims the bites don't even hurt!

She said ,"I am never afraid of snakes not even a little bit .I'm crazy for them. Krista ,the first of three children was introduced to the animals by the Dad Jamie 33 who is a snake specialist.

He said ,Snakes was one of her first words.I knew when she was very little that they were going be her passion.

From an early age she wasn't like a normal kid,she wasn't afraid of the snakes at all.She wants to go up and grab and pet or play with them."

The Father and daughter team enjoy also weekends searching for rattlesnakes,one of the most dangerous species in the world.

And they upload their hair -raising videos of all their adventures to their SnakeHunters TV Channel on YouTube.

Krista has already set her sight on opening her own reptile zoo when she is older because she wants to change people's perception s about snakes.

She further said,"Some people are afraid of snakes and they want to kill them but I think they are really cool and interesting.

One day I want to own every kind of reptile in the world"

Dear UNDW reader,is this brave or.?Parents is this right?...Hmmmm.

Sights& Sounds:Butcher Charged With "Sexually butchering" a Child

You know how I get about an adult sexually abusing a child.The case of adults sexually battering children is on the steady increase and until there is a draconian law put in place against such a gruesome offence they will not stop.

Find below the story of a butcher who seemed tired of butchering beef and decided to sexually butcher a minor.

A Lagos butcher,Oye Adeleke has been charged with rape by Abule Egba Magistrates' Court in Lagos. 

He is alleged to have defiled his customer's  child and is facing a two- count charge of child defilement and attempt to escape from police custody. 

The prosecutor ,Insp. Rachael Williams,told the court that Adeleke committed the offences on January 19th at Tinubu Market.Gown Estate,Iyana Ipaja,Lagos.Williams said that,the accused  defiled the 14 year old,when she was sent to the market by her mother. 

'The accused told the girl that her mother kept meat in his freezer and asked her to go and take it.When the girl wanted to open the freezer,the accused used handkerchief to cover her mouth to prevent her from shouting while he raped her." Williams said.  

She added that the accused attempted to escape from the police custody when he was arrested.She said that the offence contravened Sections 21 and 137 of Criminal Law of Lagos state,2011. 

The accused however pleaded not guilty.The Magistrate ,Tajudeen Elias ,granted him bail in the sum of N500,000 with two sureties in like sum,and adjourned the case till March 17th for mention.

Keep Off Your Husband's Phones! Dayo Amusa Warns Wives

The Gorgeous Dayo Amusa

We all know the beautiful  actress Dayo Amusa .She has this to say about how women cause problems in their marriages.Find her views.

In her words to women,"Some of us complain of problems in marriage and some are down with one sickness or the other simply because we don't want to overlook those irrelevant things. 

Why on earth should a woman carry the husband's phone when he is in the bathroom just because she wants to catch him in his sexcapades? 

Why create time just to drive around town looking for where his car is parked?Why liase with your female friends to get him caught when some of them are after him and ready to take him from you? 'Na High blood pressure you wan give yourself so' 

I don't  think this is necessary because even the man preaching to you and kissing his wife on national TV could have his girlfriend sitting right in front of him.You see your husband's friend kiss his wife as they move along the road and to you ,he is the best husband on earth;he could be the chief of all sinners and your husband a saint to him. 

A guy here will always use his wife's picture as his profile ;you won't even get to see his own face here.But right there on his page are three girlfriends.This very randy guy uses that to deceive the poor woman and showers all kinds of praises on her meanwhile ,one of the girlfriends on his page is a married woman.Ladies your pastor may shower those praises on his wife with his girlfriend sitting right on the first row! 

I know every woman wants to be celebrated by her man .I know we all love it when our pictures are used as his profile picture.I know we love to be hugged and kissed by him as we walk with friends,but I also know that some men are not good at it and yet they are better than some smart thieves.Just ignore those things that lead to sickness and the end of happiness in your marriage,keep loving and praying for him.With age ,he will get tired and come home even if he sleeps with two women daily. 

Ladies ,don't go to your man's phone,if you are number one or ten,that's where you are in his life.Even when he doesn't ask it,girls are ready to send nude pictures of fake breasts and buttocks just to have him.If he loves you,they can play all the games with you but you 'ill remain the one he truly loves and adores;others are just play things.All the photos and text messages await you once you develop the itching ears.When eventually you see them,you will either take a walk or live in perpetual sadness.You see,it's not worth it."

Dear UNDW readers do you agree with here?

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Sights & Sounds:Policeman Attacks Wife With Cutlass Over Missing N70,000

Domestic violence erupted in the home of Michael Okoli when he attacked his wife with a cutlass. The barbaric act that a man should attack his wife with a cutlass has been an issue in the African society .

In this peculiar case, we have a man who is a policeman by profession ,who is meant to uphold the law when domestic issues like this arises being the culprit .

Find below the story how, Michael Okoli pictured below ,assaulted his wife, who is lying in the hospital in critical condition with a cutlass

Michael  Okoli

A policeman Michael Okoli has been arrested by the police at Okokomaiko Division for attacking his wife,Felicia with a cutlass. 

The incident happened at their home at 4,Abukareem Close ,Afromedia Estate,Lagos State,Nigeria. 

His wife is in critical condition at Gbagada General Hospital after she was rejected by many hospitals. 

The Delta State born Okoli confessed that he was angry after he did not find the N70,000.00 he kept aside for the house rent and when he asked his wife about the missing money,she was rude to him,and in anger he took a sharp cutlass and started attacking Felicia with it. 

Okoli ,who is an elder in Celestial Church of Christ at Afromedia and a spy policeman,said he did not  know what came over hjm while carrying out the attack. 

It was gathered that it was not the first time Okoli was attacking Felicia with cutlass.He admitted he cut off one of Felicia's fingers during a quarrel before this incident happened. 

Narrating what happened,Okoli said he kept the N70,000 at home before he went to work and when he returned and checked where he kept the money,it was no longer there. 

He said, when he asked Felicia about the money ,she was rude and started abusing him ,asking him whether he was sure he kept any money at home at all. 

Felicia reportedly reminded him that he said he had no money and left her to fend for the family.

The response provoked Okoli who attacked her with cutlass.The couple got married 18 years ago and blessed with four children. 

It was gathered that he will be charged with attempted murder after the matter had been transferred to SCID,Pantio,Yaba for further investigation.

Sights & Sounds:Beggar Caught Stealing School Girl

This incident happened in a public school in Lagos.Our children should feel safe at home and in school and no one should be allowed into the school premises without authorisation.Therefore security in our public schools should be beefed up.Find below the story :

A beggar caught stealing a 5 year old girl ,Aishat hassan,in a school compound in Lagos State has been charged to court. 

The Kano State born man Aminu Hamisu ,who begs for alms at Agege area of Lagos State was charged with abduction and stealing before the Ebule Egba Magistrate's court ,sitting in Lagos. 

It was alleged that Hamisu went to Olusanya Primary School ,Agege to steal Aishat,pretending that she was his daughter. 

While he was escaping with the girl ,a resident who knew Hamisu as a popular beggar in Agege ,challenged him. 

Hamisu could not explain his relationship with the girl and attempted to escape without the girl,but the residents in the area pursued him. 

When the beggar was eventually caught,the residents handed him over to the police in the area. 

At the police station ,Hamisu reportedly confessed that he stole the girl but refused to reveal what he wanted to do with her. 

When the suspect was charged to court ,he pleaded not guilty. 

The presiding Magistrate,T.A Elias,granted him bail in the sum of N100,00.00 with two sureties in like sum.Hamisu was remanded in Kirikiri Prisons in Lagos pending when he would fulfill his bail condition. 

The matter was adjourned till 15 march,2014.

Sights & Sounds: Arowolo condemned to death same week his wife was stabbed to death

Mr Akolade Arowolo after the sentencing

Earlier in the week ,we wrote on the story of the man Mr  Akolada Arowolo who was standing trial  for killing his wife banker wife Titilayo in 2011.Find the story here.

The judge Justice Lateef Okunnu,has finally passed judgement on the accused, who was suspected of killing his wife. Based on the forensic report carried out on the deceased by Prof John Oladapo Obafemi a pathologist,there is no way she would have stabbed herself  76 times to death.

Find the complete story as reported by the NAN in the following link Arowolo condemned to Death

Sights & Sounds: Odd News of a Woman who delivers a sizeable stone

This is odd news .A woman is said to have given birth to a 'sizeable stone'.It could be an expensive prank that was played on her.Find below the story as culled from the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) .

A 25 year old woman in a remote village of Yolde Pate in Yola South Local Government Area of Adamawa State,north east Nigeria,claimed on Tuesday she delivered a 'sizeable stone'. 

Amina Bello of Unguwar Jalo village ,narrated her story at the opening ceremony of Veisco Vagina Fistula (VVF) free medical treatment in Yola Specialists Hospital. 

Bello,who was also a VVF patient told the gathering that ,after four years of pregnancy ,she finally delivered  sizeable stone last year. 

" I was holding a pregnancy for the duration of four years ,which I bitterly suffered because of the heavy weight of what it contained in my stomach". 

"It was last year around June ,I started feeling labour  and in that condition for three days and finally I delivered a stone," 

She that it was after the delivery that she discovered that she was affected with VVF.“It was last year around June, I started feeling labour and I was in that condition for three days and finally I delivered a stone,’’ Bello said. 

She said that it was after the delivery she now discovered that she was affected with VVF. 

Responding, Dr Sunday Lengmang, Director VVF Center, Jos, confirmed that giving birth to a stone or any object was possible. 

Lengmang was in Yola to attend to the VVF patients for the duration of one week . 

“Stones and other solid objects can form in a human body in different cases. Stones can form in a gall bladder, urinary bladder and other several parts of urinary tracks,’’ Lengmang said. 

The doctor explained that why women with VVF were prone to giving birth to stones or any solid object was because they drink less water to reduce urine leakage. 

He said as a result of taking less water their urine become concentrated. 

“Inside urine, there is salt, sodium and chlorine, and when the urine becomes concentrated the salt now crystallized and finally forms itself and latter end up as stone,’’ he said. 

Lengmang confirmed that three VVF patients had stones in their placentas and they would go under surgery. 

He said the size of the stones uncovered from the three women was six by seven and three by four centimeters. 

Lengmang advised VVF patients to drink more water instead of taking less to prevent them from risk of having stones.

Earlier, the wife of the Governor, Dr Halima Nyako, said the medical treatment was free and that over 150 women benefited in 2013

Sights & Sounds:Murder -Arowolo Knows Fate February 21

A case of domestic violence gone terribly wrong .Find below the story of a man who is accused of stabbing his wife to death 76 times!

The Accused  Mr Akolade Aworolo

An Ikeja High Court has fixed Friday,  Feb 21 to deliver judgement on the case of alleged murder,filed agianst Akolada Arowolo,charged with stabbing his wife,Titilayo to death. 

The date is contained in a Hearing Notice,issued to the Prosecution and Defence counsel.The date has been communicated to the :Lagos State Directorate of Public Prosecutions(DPP) and Arowolo's counsel.Barr. Olarenwaju Ajanaku. 

Arowolo was arraigned on December 21 2011,before Justice  Lateef Okunnu,on a one-count charge of murder. 

The Lagos State Directorate of Public Prosecution,Barr, Olabisi Ogungbesan,had alleged that the accused murdered Titilayo ,a banker ,on June 24,2011  at his residence ,No 8 Akindeinde Street ,Isolo,Lagos. 

The deceased relatives ,including father ,George Oyakhire and her step-mother,Adetoun ,had testified that Arowolo's marriage was characterised by domestic violence. 

Another witness,Prof John Obafunwa , Consultant Pathologist and Chief Medical Examiner of Lagos State,had also testified that Titilayo was stabbed 76 times. 

The accused ,who testified on May 22,2013 ,however denied the allegation,blaming his in-laws for the trouble in his marriage. 

He had insisted that his wife died after she accidentally fell on a knife during a quarrel on his birthday. 

The court remanded him in Ikoyi prison ,Lagos.

What Husbands & Wives Should Tell Their Teenage Daughters

It is generally accepted that  daughters are unique.They are the children that think about people at home even when they are far from home.It does not mean that ,sons are not wonderful but daughters are thoughtful and sensitive to those things that sons might not be.

Have we ever thought about the gift of having our daughters.Why do parents want to protect them from people that will hurt them?Why do we have to stress the need for our daughters to be independent and still have a feminine attributes with morals.?Why do we show love to them /

Daughters have different relationships with their mothers and fathers.While they are being groomed ,it is essential to express things we should tell our daughters as they grow older,as they are the future wives and mothers of tomorrow. 

Telling them these things helps them build their psyche and self worth.The following are what should be said to the daughters especially the teenage daughters:

• Dress properly- They can be trendy and still dress elegantly,for you dress the way you want to be addressed.
• Know your worth-Knowing that she is loved , she would have pride in herself and be confident..
• Being Intimate with boys - It is good to be friends with boys but she should not listen to the first John that proclaims an undying love for her.It is better to wait for the right time,when she is wiser and more matured.
• Sex -Do not be in a hurry to have sex .It can lead to unwanted pregnancies,sexually transmitted diseases or worse HIV/AIDS.The baby daddy can disown the pregnancy.What a shame!
• Peers-Be very mindful of the company you keep  for they can be great influence.So it is either they influence you for good or bad.
• Benefit of hard work- To be strong in her work ethic, gives her the zeal and apparatus to have a great morale standing  and propel her to a future of nation building.
• Role Model- The daughter will have someone she looks up to and acts accordingly because some day she will be a role model to some little girl.The question is do you want to be a positive role model or negative role model? 
• To be religious- Being religious ,is a great guide.Loving and worshipping God never goes wrong keeps one on track

Sights & Sounds: Man Hangs Self After Allegedly Killing Wife

What would drive a man to kill himself.In the story below  culled from NAN.An ex- banker reportedly hangs himself.Continues below...

Probably for fear of being held responsible for the death of his wife,a 40 year old man ,Anthony Bankole , who was an ex-staff of a commercial bank,yesterday hanged himself in his uncompleted building at Olodo area Kumapayi,Ibadan. 

It was gathered that the man had fought his wife ,Kemi ,who died later in the hospital last Saturday before he chose to take his own life. 

According to a source ,the man ,who resided at Abayomi Road had deceived a neighbour ,that he was going to withdraw some money from the bank through his Automated Teller Machine card,when he decided to hang himself. 

The source said that it was too late for anybody to prevent him from dying as the deceased sent a text that he was going to kill himself after he left the house. 

The source said, " I did not have any premonition of his death because his wife died on Saturday.When he told me ,he was going out ,I even gave him some money as transport fare and told him not to stay out long." 

The deceased lost his wife last Saturday and arrangements were being made for the burial as her remains were still in the mortuary. 

It was gathered that Mrs Bankole had a business centre art the University College Hospital,UCH. 

The source said the wife did not die on the spot as she was rushed to the UCH but died some minutes after and the remains taken to Yemetu Mortuary. 

According to the neighbour ,"We heard him shouting for help around 2.00 am on Saturday morning  and with the help of another neighbour ,she was rushed to the hospital.By that time she was already foaming in the mouth

Why Do Husbands Batter Their Wives

The issue of domestic violence is a societal menace in alot of marriages today.It is imperative to lay emphasis on the fact that some women would rather have their husbands physically batter them while others will not.Battering is relative,it can be verbal and non verbal (physical).

Alot of women literate or not ,suffer this menace and bear the pain in silence. Keeping up appearances in public has become their specialty,as it is their darkest secret which they would rather keep to themselves.What a façade, that marriage is not a 'happy ever after' tale for these women.

Domestic violence which is also psychological,makes the heart of these women skip at the sight of their husbands.They tend to be more frightened than being respectful to their husbands.

There are several questions that comes to mind in respect of women, that are in abused relationships or marriages.Why do these women stay with the men that batter them? Why do men batter their wives?Is it the best way to resolve clashes whenever they arise between the spouses?Is it due to growing up in a dysfunctional home or it is hereditary? Is it pure unadulterated wickedness of  man to his wife? These are questions that are rhetorical because there is no concrete answer to these questions.

Domestic violence in homes cuts across people from all works of life,social and political pedestal. There have been  cases of religious men battering their wives .There was a case of a man who was a pastor ,who told his fellow pastors that he has never quarrelled with his wife of over 20 years since they have been married.However his wife, picked that same moment to report her husband to his pastor friends that she is thinking about leaving him if he does not change his attitude towards her because he has been abusive to her in the marriage as she can not take it anymore.

A woman can be battered by her man for any reason that he feels justifies his attack on her. It could be number of pieces meat in his plate of food ,water was not properly placed in his hands,for refusing to have sex with him which could lead to matrimonial rape,even when the man is caught cheating on her ,she gets the beating of her life for questioning him...how awful.

Women are fragile ,and when the man married her ,as he said his vows ,he did not say " to have and to slap!' he said ,"to have and to hold".If he had said the former the marriage would not have been conducted.

Women who are in such abusive marriages it is better to leave the man for he will never change!

For Singles Aspiring to be Wives or Husbands

Marriage though can be all chocolate & caramel but it is not

 "Marriage is not a bed of roses,...its got thorns too". Being happy in a marriage is relative ,but one can be content in a marriage especially if it is to the man or woman of your choice.Marriage is not the answer to all singles' challenges,as it comes with a fair share of 'compound challenges'.

Being married gives singles a companion to share their joys and pains with yet, it is said that while dating ,one can not comprehend who their partner is till they are married .

However,one should have set standards of what they want in their spouse as they will get to know them better after marriage.Having set standards of what one wants in their spouse is expected and not wrong ,as these set standards will enable one know what to expect from their spouse as no one is perfect.

Singles should note being sexually compatible is not a great foundation for choosing a spouse, there have to be certain qualities they seek for in their spouse.

For ladies ,it does not mean that the first dude that comes with a marriage proposal is the right man for you You have to look beyond what you see.

Is he neat?,is he responsible?,does he respect you?,does he treat you with care?is he confident?.does he appreciate you for being there with him?.Is he God fearing?etc.These questions are guidelines that will enable you see beyond the physical attributes he has.

For the men,the question arises ,will this lady be a good wife?,is she pretending,can she cook?,will she make me happy,will she keep the home neat?,is she reasonable ?, will she nag ?,since she is always complaining whenever I am out with the boys.Will she respect my family?etc.These things and more are what you discover while you are courting.

Therefore ,can a woman or man have an idea of the spouse he/she wants during courtship?I believe that there are little things that will give him or her away its just to know what to look out for.For example,If the man will be physical with the ;lady ,he is sure to loose his temper and hit her.

As for the lady ,if she is not a good home maker ,she is bound to prepare a meal that taste like 'saw dust' and her personal hygiene might not be wonderful.

Being able to determine what you want in our spouse is the first step to a happy marriage.

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Lessons for Husbands & Wives as Parents

Children are quite perceptive ,believe it or not.They know when things are not right at home.They can tell when something is wrong  and out of the usual at home .They learn from those at home faster, than they would want to imagine.

Children are so talented that when you put them with adults ,they start acting like adults because they are very good copy cats.

For this sole reason  as well as others ,we have to watch what we say ,how we act or what we do,in front of the children. The use of foul language is always prohibited in front of the children that is why as parents & guardians we have to lead by example,for our children depict who we are.

How  husbands and wives relate with themselves in front of the children is paramount to the moulding of the child.Do they use the magic words such as ,'please' & 'thank you',or do they scream at each other all the time ,when talking to each other.Do they show love,anger or indifference?

How they relate enables children to learn,the following:

• Respect -in dealing with elders and peers
• Selflessness -by learning to make sacrifices in other to be of help 
• Confidence -Individual confidence in their capabilities
• Commitment - loyalty to those they love and commitment to whatever they set their mind to achieve.thereby making them better adults.

So lets get it right so that the future will be bright.

Sights& Sounds: Wife Baths Husband With Steamy Hot Water

"Hell hath no fury like that of a woman scorned",in this this case 'cheated on'.We scream domestic violence against women. but this is a case of a wife causing physical harm to her husband.Find below the story.

A 28  year old housewife,Chidinma Kalu ,on Friday appeared in an Apapa Magistrates' Court in Lagos ,charged with pouring hot water on her husband.

Kalu who resides at Ijora Badia area of Apapa,Lagos is facing a one count charge of assault.

The Prosecutor,Insp. Friday Inedu,told the court that the accused committed the offence on February 8,at their residence.

Inedu alleged  that, the accused assaulted Mr Wisdom Akpan by pouring hot water all over his body ,which caused him bodily harm.

"The accused assaulted the husband ,when she caught him cheating on her with another woman,"he said.

The prosecutor said,that the offence contravened Section 171 of the Criminal Law code of Lagos State,2011.

After the charges were read to her ,the accused pleaded not guilty.If convicted the accused faces three years in prison.

The Senior Magistrate,Mr Adeyemi Amos,admitted the accused to bail in the sum of N50,000 with one surety in like sum.

He adjourned the case to February 17 for trial (NAN).

Sights & Sounds:Paedophile Pastor,62 Gets Two Years .

The war against paedophiles is on ! Find below the story according to The Vanguard newspaper.

An Egor Magistrates's Court Benin ,on Friday sentenced a 62 year old "pastor",Alfred Idonogie to two years imprisonment for defiling a 10 year old girl.

Chief Magistrate Taye Omoruyi found Idonogie guilty of the offence after the prosecutor presented five witnesses who testified in proof of the charge.

The prosecutor witnesses include the victim's grandmother,the victim,the investigating police officer and the medical doctor,who established that there was penetration into the little girl's private part.

The court said that the accused committed the offence on June 25,2013 at Onaghino Street ,Medical Stores road ,Benin City.

The Judge said the convict would spend six months in jail if he agreed to pay N200,000.00.

Counsel to the accused ,Mr  U. Osa -Uwagie,indicated his interest to contest the judgement on the appeal.

The Coordinator,Edo State Child Protection Network,Jennifer Ero ,took up the matter,said the judgement was a victory for the child.

She urged the public to be committed in the fight against child abuse.

Happy Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day Everyone!

Part 2: For the Married,Guidelines & Reality

marriage like old wine gets better with age.

6}Celebrations -Anniversaries ,birthdays,valentines day,and other events that means alot to the couple should be celebrated. Have romantic dinners,go all out to make it count.for your spouse.

Reality- Most of them will say everyday is a day of love if it is valentines day,birthdays they could just wish you a happy birthday if they remember.Anniversary?...hmmm they could just say what matters is that we are together no need to waste money or time going anywhere.

7) Just because you are married ,does not mean that life has stopped.At least once a  month,take her out to dinner,spend the evening just the two of you ..date nights are important in a marriage.

Reality -Hmm as much as date nights are important in a marriage,what if the spouse is not the outgoing type or there are limited funds in the home that, even buying  a cone of ice cream is an issue,or there is no one to take care of the children.

The practical solution is to get them something on the way back from work.Most ladies love  ice cream,cakes ,pizza  and the likes.in terms of going to the movies,they could buy the movie(s)  they want to see and watch all cuddled up on a sofa in the comfort of their home when the kids have gone to bed even if they sleep off while watching the movie,the most important thing is that they have their alone time.

8)Be proud of your husband/wife. Walk together holding hands,text your during the day.your husband /wife should be your best friend,be free.Ask silly questions like 'what are you having for lunch?','What would you like for supper?', 'Can I get you anything?','Oh I just called to say I miss you.' etc.

Reality-Now this is so amusing.Most times when you see husbands & wives walking ,the husband is always ahead of the other.The husband is always in a hurry forgetting that the wife  is as graceful as a cat as she she walks with pride and elegance especially when she is wearing heels. 

The practical thing is wife, lets husband walk as he pleases ,he can go ahead and secure a place for them while she joins him later.

The mood the spouse is in also determines why the spouse is walking ahead.It could be an emergency!

Sending messages could make the spouse suspicious,believe it or not ,when they get such messages they(wives) feel their spouse has been up to a mischief  and wants forgiveness and if its the husband he feels the wife wants something and will be on his guard.

9) People get scared to talk about this,sex.Sex does destroy marriages.SATISFY your husband /wife sexually .So that your spouse is not tempted outside the marriage.It is a gift that can be perfectly enjoyed in holy matrimony.

Reality-In the honey stage ,sex is not a problem,but when things settle in the marriage then it becomes a problem.There are cases of alot of women who are engaging in extra marital affairs  because the husband is not performing in the bedroom department.Those who are not having affairs are frustrated sexually.

The practical thing is to have the days they have sex  and spice things up in the bedroom department so that they look forward to being with one another.

10) Everyday never forget to say "I love you " to your husband or wife at least 5 times a day.It never gets boring."I love you sweety",'good night my love".

Reality- hahahahahhahhahaha.This cracked ,me up so much I had tears in my eyes.It is okay to show your spouse how much he/she is appreciated,but to say it five times or more.The spouse will ask the other spouse spouse what is wrong .what mischief does he/she want forgiveness for.

The practical thing is say 'I love you "but back your sayings with actions .Show  through your actions how much you love your spouse.,by checking up on them when you are away from each other,showing correction with love etc.

11) Never go to bed angry,solve those arguments with love.Fight all you can but at the end ,remember to pray together.

Reality- Never go to bed angry ,HA! "NA LIE".Every couple has their off days.The fact is that when you go to bed angry ,it does not stop you guys from being cordial.Do not be so angry that you say things without filter that you can not take back after you have settled your differences.Always try to resolve your differences before it gets out of hand.

Find the Part 1 of For the Married ,Guidelines & Reality  here

Abomination ,17 Year Old Sleeps With His Own Mother

The strangest of things that happens in today's world due to bad parenting ,always transcends to the society It is a taboo for a son or daughter to be sexually involved with their parents .The story below is about a son that who slept with his own mother and raped four children.

In Abakakili the Nigerian Security and Civil Defence Corps,NSDC,in Ebonyi State,arrested a serial rapist and homosexual,Chibuike Maduka,who allegedly raped four children of different parents at Ndibe in Afikpo North Local Government Area of the State.  

The suspect who blamed his strange escapades on his mother,Mrs Idam Augustina Josephine,confessed to have had sexual intercourse with his mother on several occasions and that he does not know what usually compel him to have sex with children n the area.

Parading the suspect at the Command HQ in Ababkakili ,the state Commandant of NSCDC,Mrs Ego Echendu,said the suspect was arrested after a tip-off by an indigene of the area,adding that the suspect had in a confessional statement disclosed that he had sexual intercourse with his mother. 

He said ,"We got a tip-off and sent some of our men to follow up on the information concerning an adolescent male who has been in the business of raping children. 

"We continued to monitor the suspect and fortunately our divisional office at Afikpo, North Local Government Area was able to locate him and his mother who we reliably gathered ,was also a key player in the son's sexual escapades. 

"The suspect confessed to have been having sexual intercourse with his biological mother and we asked to know when it started and he said ,since last year (2013) and also claimed that the mother usually encouraged him to sleep with children of tender ages.  

Because this case involves case involves women and children of these age bracket,we ,we want to transfer this case to the Ministry of Women Affairs in the state for them to take it up. 

"He sleeps with his own biological mother who is in custody now; and again he also was told us that he is a homosexual,he sleeps with other male friends. 

From my analysis,I think he has some sought of brain disorder" 

It was gathered by Vanguard that the suspect,who hailed from Amangu village in Nkpohoro,began,raping young children since 2008 and a Senior Secondary School ,SSS1 student of Oziza Secondary School Afikpo North Local Governemt Area of the state. 

My mother used me for ritual-Suspect 

According to the suspect,"I am here because of my mother.She used me for ritual.I don't know what I am doing.If I see a little child I will rape her.This act started in 2008,it is not my fault but that of my mother."I have raped my mother and four children.My father is late.I don't know myself again.I had homosexual activities with one Emmanuel three times at Amangu in Afikpo North Local Government Area. 

However his mother denies the allegations 

Reacting,the mother of the suspect,Mrs Idam Augustina Josephine ,45 denied having any sexual involvement with his son,insisting that she doesn't know what was happening to her son. 

She said ,"I am 45 years and the mother of Chbuike Maduka.How can I teach my child to rape little children? I am here because my son raped some children,he is telling a lie,he never had any sexual relationship with me.

Someone is definitely lying.Is it the son or mother?

Part 1: For the Married ,Guidelines & Reality

As the saying goes,"experience is the best teacher".The taste of marriage is in the actual experience.There are different phases as published earlier ,in case you missed it ,please click  here .

The reality of marriage is different from anything that is written in books or taught in marriage classes before the wedding and it is not a fairy tale.These are just guidelines,like a handbook.  Guidelines are different from reality.

Find below, these said guidelines which in reality is a different ball game entirely ;

1) When you wake up,no matter how short or long the marriage is kiss her good morning,Don't Greet Her.

Reality-There are times one wakes up moody whether they have been married for a year or 10 years all days are not the same.Practically one should always acknowledge the spouse and tell the spouse how he/she is feeling.Especially if the spouse is not the observant type.Different strokes for different  folks.

2)  When he comes home DON'T SIT DOWN,stand u and meet at the door,a hug or kiss and ask how his day was for he spent most of it trying to make sure you have food on the the table. 

 Reality- It is  appropriate to do that but what if wife is in the kitchen,or doing household chores  or there  changing baby's diaper.

a) it is better to welcome him with a smile,if it is a norm to hug and kiss then it is appropriate he walks over to her.

b) Or she can say hello,tidy up to a point with whatever she is doing and  meet him in the privacy of their bedroom to give him a proper welcome.

3)Pray before you sleep.Together as a family always thank God.

Reality-Prayer is key in a home,yet not all families pray together. Alot of husbands and wives especially those that are extremely busy do not find time to pray together,due to their schedule.If they pray they do it alone most times.

b) What if the husband /wife is not the praying type.You find the wife or husband praying alone all the time

When they discuss as usual in or out of bed they can always just say 'thank you Lord'.As simple as that is,its powerful and says it all.

4)Daily no matter how tired you are, spend time to discuss how your day went.

Reality- This  part of communication is relative.Daily highs and lows are  usually at meal times or in bed or otherwise depends on the couple's routine.If they are apart then they can do it over the phone if they can.

5) Finding moments to encourage one another from the scriptures.

Reality- Finding time to encourage each other is important however its relative.Lets call a spade a spade .Studies have shown that 88.9% of wives are more prayerful and spiritual than their husbands except where the husband is a pastor.The practical solution is always pray for your husband and tell him quotes from the bible when ever u are trying to make a point.

To be continued...

Man 27 Rapes a 2 year old girl

Another  paedophile strikes.it calls to mind the question ,what caliber of men do we have today?Is there a shortage of matured women who will be willing to go out with them that they have decided to hurt little girls.?Is it a psychological defect ,that they find it difficult to talk to matured women due to low self esteem?

 Find below the story.

At Osogbo a magistrate's court has ordered a 27 year old man Akeeb Ibrahim to remanded in Ilesa prison allegedly raping a two year old girl.

Ibrahim was alleged to have the girl (name withheld) in his room at his house located at Isale -Afo area of Ikirun,headquarters of Ifelodun local Government Area of Osun State.

According had to the charge sheet read in court,the accused person lured the girl into his room at about 1:00 pm,when her parents had left for their shop.

The Police prosecutor ,Abiodun Fagboyinbo,an inspector,told the court that the accused unlawfully had carnal knowledge of the girl.

He explained that,the accused person had through his action committed rape ,an offence which he said was contrary to Section 218 and 222 of the criminal code ,cap 34 vol 11,laws of Osun State,Nigeria 2003 and 2007 respectively.

The accused person ,however pleaded not guilty to the two count charge of the rape and assault leveled against him.

Counsel to the accused person Mr Amaechi Ngwu,prayed the curt to grant hi client bail in the most liberal terms,stressing that the accused person should be presumed innocent until the contrary is proved.

In his ruling ,Magistrate Olusola Aluko turned down the oral application  of the counsel to the accused person and ordered the accused to be remanded in Ilesa prison custody pending a formal application by his counsel.

He adjourned the case till March 3,2014 fo mention.

Husbands & Wives in Phases of Marriage

Marriage is just like wine that gets better as it gets older,the older the wine the higher the value of the wine as it passes through the fermenting stage till it gets to the the age that its unique. Marriage is a life long journey that ,that will surely be tested as it progresses.

It has different phases that will need to be understood by those who are travelling the route.

The different stages are as follows:

Phase 1- Passion-This is the honeymoon stage.The couple are all lovey dovey.The romance in this stage is intense and sweet.The intimacy at this stage prepares the couple for children .

Solution: While lust ,and the romps are good at this stage ,it is vital that they do not loose focus of who they are outside the bedroom walls.They should establish the friendship and companionship that will take them through the stages to come in the future.

Phase 2 - Reality- This is the realization phase.It is the phase of accepting  one's spouse as the couple gets to know who the each other for real.This stage is full of disappointments and conflicts .This stage is inevitable in a marriage .

Solution: To resolve or get through this stage ,frequent discussion is needed and the couple will need to listen to each other-Communication.

Phase 3- Conflicting Ideas-This stage is unavoidable as well in a marriage.The couple could experience the need to do other things  as they feel they are missing out on the things that is essential to their being able to function as a couple.These things are relative such as she wants a career,he wants to her to be at his beck and call;she feels stifled and wants to go out more often ,he wants to hang out with the boys .

This could be termed the make or break stage in the marriage,though marriages can be dissolved at any time but this is the foundation of the couple accepting each other's weaknesses.

Solution : They should have a common ground and develop individual avenues to let out their steam .They have to learn to have agreements and stick to it .keeping promises and not talk down or ignore their spouse.

Phase 4 Comfortable Cooperation- The couple having survived the above stages ,have settled into their routine.Things get complicated in their lives as a couple as things gets less spicy in the bedroom department.They have bills to pay,go to work,above all care for their children .

Solution : They have to not loose sight that before they were parents they were a couple and that the kids will one day leave the house .What then?They have to keep their passion for each other alive.have date nights when ever they can.

Phase 5 -Reunion-The couple are done with parenting and their financial burden has been reduced.They are settled into their fields of career path ,and are rediscovering themselves as friends,companions and seekers.

Solution:With so much time in your hands now.find time to reignite good old memories.,plan a trip or give yourselves treats.

Phase 6-Explosion- This is a very unpredictable stage in a marriage.It could be due to job loss,health challenges,financial troubles as the couple settles into the marriage routine.It can happen at anytime in a marriage.The couple could be going through a life changing experience that could affect their marriage for a day,a year, or a life time.

Solution: Finding solace in one another is paramount to dealing with this situation.Find joy in daily activities ans keep yourselves happy and healthy as best as you can while facing these challenges.

Phase 7 -Completion- This is the stage of achievement and security in your marriage

Action-create a project that will keep you both happy and bring you together.